I've been watching some of Marvel's newest series for the past months and something clicked me last night. The Inhumans I watched earlier didn't really taught me of anything but I could see the resemblance with Indonesian myths of the god and goddess of Moon: Batari Ratih and Batara Kamajaya. As a couple, they are known as god and goddess of love, ruler of the Kahyangan Cakra Kembang with the gate located on the Moon or what is called Chandra in Sanskrit.

What kinda hit me was that Blackagar Boltagon, being the king of the Moon, could not speak for his voice alone can destroy everything in front of him. His wife / interpreter Medusalith Amaquelin is the one who is more vocal, more known to people--as also the character of Batari Ratih. Perhaps that's why Batara Kamajaya is almost never surfaced, rarely mentioned, and unknown to many.

via deviantart

Last night I finished another season of series: Cloak and Dagger. Now speaking of the mortals (unlike the super-humans in Inhumans), I can relate more to the character of Tandy Bowen or known as Dagger. She had her 'life' taken away from her when she was 10 and she has been living life in bitter ever since. She's quite lucky to be born white and has pretty face so people would have a nice first impression on her--and she is making the most out of it. But later at night when she's alone, she is tired with life. I guess therefore she was given to see hopes to keep her going.

On the contrary, Tyrone Johnson or Cloak had everything gotten better in his life since the accident when he was 8. He has been trying his best to fulfil people's expectation of him, especially for being black in an exclusive private school. But despite all that he is brave. He dares to face his problems instead of running away like what Tandy usually does. Sometimes he second-guess himself, sometimes he's looking at the wrong direction. But he is brave, thus he was given to see other people's fears so he can be even braver than before.

The pair characters are completely opposite. What Tandy sees and fears aren't visible for Tyrone and it's the other way around. Their skins and family background; the way they see things, think, act; and even the gifts they are given... everything are just totally different. But that's why they are compatible, for being the exact opposite of each other. And that's why they need each other.

via CBR

I started another series too, Jessica Jones. It's an oldie (2015) but I never watched it before. She is another Marvel's superhero who is retired from her days of being cheerfully helping people under the identity of Jewel, and lives her life now just to get paid to buy more whiskey; to survive just another day. The series highlighted her adult life after the traumatic phase where she was made to do unimaginably horrible things by Killgrave and thus her second revival began.

These movies about superheroes made me realized one thing: these super people are actually mere humans. They may have something greater than most of people, something the creators exaggerate and call as superpower, but they all have emotions, flaws, and traumas. They were damaged, but one thing that made them superheroes is that they don't give up. They still fight to do something, if not for others then for themselves first. They believe in the greater good, and they also believe in a better tomorrow. And they fight for it despite the bitter life they have to live with.

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Cloak and Dagger especially shows me (one of) the struggle(s) superheroes had to face: their own fears and weaknesses. They are forced to push their limits and to choose between giving up or fighting back. In one of the scenes our heroes talk about why they are not given what they want but instead something they didn't think they needed, because they are ought to thrive, not to just stay in the comfort zone with their limited knowledge. They need to change the direction and push their boundaries instead:

Tyrone: "If I had a knife, Detective Connors would be dead and buried."
Tandy: "If I could travel anywhere, I'd travel anywhere but here."
Tyrone: "Maybe that's why we got what we got."
Tandy: "Or we didn't get what we didn't get."

via nerdist

I ain't saying that I'm (trying to be) a hero whatsoever. I just learned a lot from their stories. And it kinda related with what just happened here. Last weekend an old friend came to visit after we'd lost contact for five years (and another five before.) He was someone I hung out with 12 years ago. We first met each other like 14-15 years back. But since the first meeting we already knew that we weren't in each other's plans. We don't belong in each other's life. But somehow we are kept in each other's hearts. And our meeting last weekend proved all that.
At one point a question occurred to me; the what ifs--which led to dozens of alternate endings I could picture in my head. All of these years, and the feelings remained. But we were young and I didn't dare to take the leap. I was the one who chickened out and ran away. I was the one who was hiding in the dark, just like the teenager Tandy Bowen did. I was faced an option but I chose the other way which led me to the life I'm in today.

via medium

He showed me pics of his three children, and how well his life is now. I truly feel happy for him and proud of how great a father he has become, but I also know it's that one thing that keeps me away from people most of the time, including him. He loves kids and wants family. I don't. I must admit that sometimes it troubles me to see how different I have been from most of my childhood friends. All of the achievements and families; and how far I am from all that. It reminds me of one of Paulo Coelho's book title: The Winner Stands Alone.

But then again it's all about the choice and consequences. Perhaps once upon a time in some incarnations ago we were couple. Perhaps in one of the multiverses he was mine and we could be together. But this is not DC Comics so it ain't happening. And in this lifetime and universe I'm given and/or choosing the other way. So I gotta let go of it--all the what ifs and if onlys--and just do my own thing. Focus on what I have instead of what's not in my path to have.

via brainyquotes

And now that I've chosen mine I must also deal with the aftermaths. I must endure all the pains and the couldn't haves. In Cloak & Dagger series, Season 1 Episode 9 "Back Breaker", where Father Delgado described in class what makes a hero. Every hero goes through the same path: they answered the call, met the mentor, and battle the Threshold Guardians. Then Delgado said: "... something knocks them down, hard. The hero regresses, they lose everything. Became less than they were when we met them. Because well, if a hero wants to be an actual hero, he has to be born again. From nothing."

So it's normal to have ups and downs. It's human to go through a regression. We are human. But we don't play the victim. We are not one and it's our call to decide what's allowed to happen in our lives and what's not. We choose to stand up and be the hero we need because nobody is doing it for us. We must become our own saviour first, then help the others if we can. Because this world need heroes. And we are all super humans inside, if only we recognize our strengths and talents, overcome our fears, and train to be better to win the battle.