It had been a while since my last post and I beg you pardon cuz I've been very busy. After 6 days of suffering on the hospital bed with lots of plastic hoses, liquid medicine, infuses, injections, oxygen addition and bitterness of staying in a strange room, the Mighty God called my beloved father last Friday by 1:35 a.m. at the ICCU room in St. Borromeus Hospital, Bandung.

At first it felt unbelievable. I was still in such great shock to see my Dad received hand pumps from the doctor and nurses to help him breathe but finally his lung gave up. After 1.5 hours of pumping and seeing no progression, Mom whispered to his ears that she forgave him, she asked forgiveness from him as well and let him go. Right after she finished her sentence, he blew his final breath. The graphic monitor turned into a long line and he was gone.

Mom became a bit hysterical and I couldn't think. I still couldn't believe it: my lovely father, the one who was still able to drive two weeks ago, to share laughter with us a week ago, just passed away. I still couldn't believe it and had some seconds to chew the bitter pill: he was gone.

It was so shocking, truly a horrible unexpected thing for all of us. I called and messaged some of the people who asked for any progression news from him and took care of the letter of death, administration stuff and went home with Kinsey, Wahyu and Tejo to get his belongings at home: his white shirt, pair of dark grey suit, underwear, tie, and shoes.


At 4 a.m. we were back to the funeral house of Borromeus and while the staff bathed and put clothes on him, I stayed awake with the rest of the friends to rewind what just happened the last six hours. It happened so fast, too soon, but I was certain that my Dad's now happy--it was obvious because we can all see the joyful smile on his now frozen face.


Time went by so fast and it was suddenly light and guests were coming to pay the last respect for my late Dad and it was so tiring but fun to greet them all, to see how much love they feel for him, to see how deep he had touched their heart when he was alive, to see how much they care for the family he left here.


But it was such a broken heart that I felt when my siblings arrived with Uncle Gavin and Aunt Dewi, how sad they felt for not being there at my Dad's last moments on earth. Especially to my brother who wasn't really close to my Dad.. it was such a heartbreaking moment but we all managed to calm down by the lunch time. I had a sleep at the room the nuns had prepared for us with Mom for not having slept at all for almost 2 days now.


At 7 p.m. the Rosary Prayer was started and it was such a beautiful service they prepared for Dad. Markus from St. Melania Parish led the prayer and singing, and Tante Olly the preacher I knew 8-9 years ago gave sermon while Mrs. Wito led the Rosary Prayer. It was very very beautiful and I was (which I'm sure was not the only one) deeply touched and felt God's presence there along with Dad's now peaceful soul.


I barely could sleep that night, my eyes were swollen and sore for too much crying and everytime I saw his belongings I started to cry again and again.. It was such a hard day for all of our family but we really had to sleep enough for another tough day so I tried hard to sleep. It was so nice to have Ara slept by my side at the sofa, holding my hand so that I could sleep more easily and calmed.


I came to the funeral house the next day by around 11 p.m. which was noon enough that I missed a friend who came from the morning. Gita was the one who announced the news to the rest of my childhood friends and without her I might not have friends to come to the funeral cuz I had no time to announce it myself.




But I still managed to meet more friends that day. At around 3.30 p.m. I went to Borromeus' canteen to have late lunch with Toba, Arie, Willy, Manto and Mennix, friends from Prova. After that we stayed at the funeral house until 7 p.m. for the Rosary Prayer again. More to come this night and Mr. Andreas gave the sermon while Mr. Tikno and Mr. Lukas led the prayer. Since Mr. Andreas was pretty close to my Dad for 15 years, he strengthen the family more to be joyous of Dad's liberation from earthy pain.

I was so happy to see many of my friends came to pay their last respect, mostly from Prova, and the last were Beatrix and Julius, and at around 10.30 p.m. we grew so tired and went back home. But the program was not end yet. Aunt Sisca was celebrating her 48th birthday so we were heading to Tan Patsy's home where they were staying over and gave her a surprise. We stayed there celebrating until around 00.30 a.m. then went home to have some rest.

We woke up so early last Sunday. It was our last day at the funeral house so we gotta go earlier. We were all dressed in white to deliver Dad's soul to Heaven with requiem mass at 10 a.m. It was such a beautiful mass led by Rm. Iwan, Pr. that he asked testimonials from Dad's friends, children and wife. It was a very touching mass and a perfect one. Then Oom Paulus, Dad's long last friend from his childhood, gave speech about Dad that made us deeply touched. It was just such a perfect end for Dad's life.

While most of the guests came home, we continued to Cikadut to burn the corpse. We arrived there at around 12.30 p.m. and had a little prayer and then my brother got the honor to press the button that would start the fire in the giant oven to burn it all to ashes. We went back home soon after that, afraid of the local gangsters to ask money from us.


Few of the family remained at our place till night and it was such a tiring, exhausting, but relieving moments that we had but somehow everybody's gonna get thru this moment sooner or later and if our time was now, then it should be the best moment that God had planned for us, especially to Dad's soul. We believe that Dad had finished all the tasks that God sent him to this earth for and he did all of them well and now he's gonna enjoy the Christ's promises soon and gonna reunite with his parents and brother up there in Heaven.


So it's just up to us who are still alive now, what to do from now on, to live the life God taught us, to live not only the mortal life but the life full of God; with faith, hope and love. To see my Dad's funeral was full of people who love him, to see how much affection and care those people gave to us, to see how great the services, prayers and testimonials they gave for his soul, are more than enough to comfort us.

Now we don't feel any sadness in our hearts because we believe God the Almighty love my Dad so much He already prepare a place for him to stay forever. I just still feel that I miss him sometimes but I know I'll be just fine. I know, because God had given the best people around me to console and replace the emptiness for Dad's departure. I know He took Dad now because He knows that we're ready to be left. And can't thank the Lord more!