Wanda Hamidah and me at Kebun Bistro, Ubud

Never had I imagined that the opportunity of being a speaker at Erstwhile book launching I agreed on could grant me a new friend. Especially because that new friend happens to be the beautiful actress / politician Wanda Hamidah. I mean, I meet celebrities quite often but not all are friendly enough or even willing to be friends with just anyone, right? And the celebrity I mean here is specifically an A-lister.

As I said on my previous post, I was scheduled to pick Mbak Wanda up at the airport at 10:45 a.m. and we headed to Ubud right away. The two-hours road trip made us chat a lot and we even shared room to prepare for the 3:30 p.m. event. After the event we spent time together browsing through the festival, had dinner and some coffee at Kebun Bistro. At 9 p.m. she dropped me off at the hotel while she went on to her hotel.

During the 10-hours encounter we shared stories as she told me hers. It hits me that a person as beautiful and smart as she also suffers from pain. She also had dreams that didn't come true: to study abroad and to become a diplomat. She--just like all of us--also had moments of heartaches, feeling secluded from the world and had no money to continue with life (and she had three kids at that moment). She had to struggle between the social pressure of being a socialita and public figure with her right for happiness and freedom.

After getting divorced from her first husband, she found someone who has good looking, good manner, good job, and follows the same religion as she does. But when there's no feeling involved, all those physical things don't mean anything. Eventually she met a guy much younger than she is (10 years younger and still struggling to settle with his profession), with totally different family background, race & religions (he's a Chinese/German & was a Christian while she's an Arab/Betawi & is a Muslim), and very different kind of profession (he's a chef). But the chemistry is there. You all know where it all leads: a marriage.

I personally share the same principal with her: we believe in love. She told me that love is a blessing. To be able to feel something is already a blessing. I guess she is right. We must embrace love. I used to think too much about life, love, and marriage in particular--which perhaps keeping me from getting married. I guess I weighed my decisions too much on my unnecessarily overthinking thoughts.

Mbak Wanda told me that as long as there is love, we'll be just fine. Even if we argue everyday. Even if the marriage / togetherness would only last for five, ten years.. So be it!  It's not the numbers that counts. It is love that matters. It is better to have maybe five years full of happiness than to be married for a long time with someone so logically perfect (or according to what's good in the eye of public) but with no love.

She is now happily married to Daniel and has a cute one-year old son Kai with him. She is now doing things she likes and doesn't really care about what people say (which to me is the best kind of freedom). She is becoming a yoga instructor, taking the next step of the workout she's been doing in 15 years. She travels with Go-Jek everywhere in Jakarta and isn't ashamed to be seen riding on motorbikes while her friends are driving cars. She wears only basic make-up and dresses up the way she feels like it; she saves the budget for beauty salons for traveling around the world with her kids. She opts for practicality and she's currently living her life to the fullest!

That night I felt lucky. Not just that I had a rare opportunity to get up, close, and personal with one of Indonesia's most beautiful celebrity, but I also get to privately listen to her life story and love advice. I looked at this woman who just turned 39 last September 21 and see a strong mother of four. Her oldest is 14 years old girl and youngest just turned one (and she gave birth to them all normally without the C-section operation!!) She had been through a lot; she had her moment at the peak, down to the bottom, and made her way back up again.

I am not a person who follows gossips and I barely hear about Wanda Hamidah before last weekend. But every time I see her flawless face on my social media timeline now (we added each other's Instagram accounts) I see a tough person who is not afraid of failures because she knows she would get back up again. I see a humble woman whose smile is carved from a lot of pain. I see so much power a woman can have, because she makes her own choices and she makes the best out of it. I see in her imperfections of life which makes her even more beautiful.

Maybe that's why people say our 30s would be much better than our 20s. We learned, make decisions, make mistakes, fell down, but we get back up again and learn from our past. We forgive people and we forgive ourselves. We carry the lessons all our lives to make better decisions, be better person and go higher, and we spread kindness because we know it's the only thing that brings warmth to our hearts.


The next day, Sunday October 30th, I met with Mbak Wanda again. This time she was with her friend's family. We met for a brief moment that day because I had another event to attend in Jimbaran and she had a plane to catch to go back to Jakarta that night. But the fact that she was willing to meet me again proved that she wasn't just bluffing about being a friend to me. I feel I am so lucky to find friendship in this strong, humble woman; and I look up to her strength, wishing that when I turn 39 I'd inspire other people through my works, my belief and my love.

Thank you for the lessons and friendship, Mbak Wanda!


P.S. I had thought about writing this blog the night of our first encounter but then today as I already began writing it I saw there's a competition running at www.bloggerperempuan.com so I put this article in. Lomba blog ini diselenggarakan oleh BP Network dan disponsori oleh L’Oreal Revitalift Dermalift. Kalau mau ikut lomba juga, klik di sini.