If anyone of you play The Sims Social in Facebook, you will know what I'm saying about "friendship level" here. I recently feel that I'm losing a close friend, who used to be my best friend along 2010-2011. I knew this was coming when my uncle foreseen it by his special ability of psychic stuff.

I felt this first when she started acting weirdly toward me, there were some bitterness in her words and I could feel that. Instead of telling it to my face, she pretends to be all okay but couldn't help stinging me by her words. She said yes, but holding a "no" behind my back. It's just fake.

I have so many friends during my 27 years on earth and I've dealt with all kinds of acquaintances, friends, good friends, close friends, BFFs, and I've dealt with awkward friends, sort of friends and ex-friends, too (they are terms used in The Sims Social). I have quite a sensitive sense about how people feel by their reaction around and toward me, so I can tell without seeing the friend level bar like in the game.

This ex-friend of mine, I can truly feel how it degrading from BFF down to awkward friend, especially by her choice of words. I can feel the insincerity in it, tho at first I spent too much time on evaluating myself: what did I do wrong, what was my fault, etc.

What troubled me more is that she has a group of friends who act quite weirdly toward me also--or maybe I'm being too cautious and suspicious here. I feel like I'm losing not just one, but a group of good friends. I feel rejected and casted away. Being a Piscean (super-sensitive and melodramatic) and a sanguine, it is such a big thing to me to lose a friend, let alone a group of it.

But, it doesn't matter anymore. The fact is, she is just not good enough to receive my attention and has not big enough heart to accept my friendship love. I still have so many other friends who want and value my presence, who deserve my caring and my love. I still have so much love to give out, so I just don't give a damn about people who doesn't want it. It's their problems, not mine, since I'm giving it all for free and sincerely.

I'm not calling this friend a fake. I'm just saying that she's being insincere to me. Sometimes feelings given aren't as much as feelings taken. Sometimes it's just not mutual... so what?
Like what is in relationships, we just need to get over with it, move on, and open heart for new (and for sure are better) people to come into our lives. I'm moving on ;)