via grist

Who doesn't like free stuff? I do, too, especially when it's something I really want/need for the moment. I remember there were time when I got so many free stuff, like free pass to some club or free voucher/coupon for a dine-in and some free samples, goodie-bags, etc. But there are also some stuff in life not given for free.

As I wrote last month that I had this issue with a close friend that she wanted a free design from me.  She said she's been asking free services from her friends and it surprised her that I charged her for a simple business card design. Yesterday I got a free book binding fee and I felt happy, so I was asking myself was it overreacting that I charged her for my design service.

Then I thought, given something free and expect/demand something to be free is two different things. If something is given free for you, then it is your luck. But if you expect something free, especially when it is valuable, then I'd say it's being cheap.

So this friend was offended for I was being calculative to my own friends while I was offended for she was taking my designing skill for granted and for using our friendship to get free stuff. What do you think on this? I talked with her to get things straight and I hated that my prejudice on her turned out right. It's funny that I have more sense now to differentiate being generous and being an idiot.

I used to give everything I have for friends and family and for the people I care about. Her words made me think if I'm no longer that person. But as I see it, I still give things unconditionally when it comes to personal stuff, friendship and humanity. When it comes to professional stuff, I be professional too. And what she asked was a business card for her business. I thought it's right for me to put it onto professional side.

Anyway I feel that I lost more and more friends now, especially in the last one year. It's like they're being filtered if they're worthy enough to stay around me. Not by me, but by the power that surrounds me now. At first I felt sad to lose them, but after a while I guess it's great to have only the greatest ones around to keep than being surrounded by parasites. I value my friends even more now!