Everybody must have their own time of desperation, and mine comes just recently. The reasons may be simple, but I guess these are why:

1. I am lack of friends. They are either getting married or drown with their own works and businesses. Getting new ones are never a problem, but still you can't replace a person with another.
2. Mom tells me to settle down, like every time she has the opportunity of saying. I know what I'm dealing with and what I need. I don't need people to tell it to my face all the time it just bore me out.
3. My job as a freelancer, projects are pending and my income is never certain. Still, I need money and need it to be fixed regularly.
4. This country has never be my home. I have my house and family here, but I don't feel like I belong here and this is killing me for I am always an alien here and I have no one understands me. Even the only person who does, doesn't care about me.
5. I dunno where or how to ask for help. My pride and ego had taken control of my life and I just can't lower down my standards.

Life's a bitch for sure. But I am truly helpless here I need to get out immediately or I'm going out of my mind and rotten up slowly...