Another Victoria's Secrets

Sunday morning, I went to St. Theresia church with my sister. We attended the 11.30 a.m. English mass at St. Peter Canisius Expatriate Parish and met Yuli there. After mass, we had lunch at Bakmi GM at Jl. Sunda. Then, we walked our way to eX to refresh ourselves.

We bumped into Andri and Benedict on our way to PI Extension and we chilled around ak.'sa.ra and The Goods Dept. for a while before we decided to hang out at Pizza e Birra. There were also Andri's friends came and made the party merrier. But at 5 p.m. Isman picked us up and we went home right away.

At 7 p.m., by my surprise, my long lost best friend Andre Santosa asked me where I was and he was coming my way. So he appeared at the apartment in short time and we spent the night together, catching up with stuff we missed along our ways and I found it was extremely comfortable to be with him.

I felt such a great vibe yesterday, for meeting Andri and Andre on the same day. They are my special guys who had helped me get through some rough times in my life, and they have been there all along. It feels really nice to know that they are still there, even after being apart for some time. It was such a delightful and peaceful thing to spend times with them, those people who love me for who I am and who support me through the hard moments.

Andri is a really cool person to hang out with and we share the same taste (especially in music) and some other stuff in life. While Andre has always been my guy, for we've shared some happy and hard times together. I was there for his brother's burial and he was there for my father's burial. We've "grown up" together, tho not all the time being together, but there is a special bond between us. I am his angel and he is my guardian. We take care of each other in sorta way, and I just can't explain how happy I am for his visit last night.

I know that I am truly blessed by the love from people around me, and I am so glad--for having best friends is already a blessing, and I have not just one or two, but so many best friends around me. I love my life so much, especially at this point, when I feel so much at peace about everything. I know, a lot more is about to come, and I am ready. Thank God, for that!

Today I went to JDC for a cover assignment. Although this was Saturday, I went there alone by taxi, carrying 25 exemplars of magazines for the goodie bags and attended the cooking class by Edwin Lau at Galleria. This was presented by Galleria and the Healthy Kingdom Community, a healthy food community by Edwin Lau.

It was really nice to have the opportunity to see the cooking live, but too bad I'm not a fan so I was just looking around, and, fortunately, got introduced to some interesting people. Not only that I got to know the vice president marketing of Matahari, I also had an interesting conversation with Edwin's sisters: Zoe and Diana.


I saw some connection from the first time, and the more we talked, the more we found similarity in one another. So Zoe was a fashion designer turned into a photographer and Diana is an interior designer. Having too much things in common, we spent most of the time chatting and exchanging general information, for I wasn't interested on the cooking at all.

After that I went back to Central Park, had dinner with my brother and met my sister at home, and being left alone for they are having their weekend stuff. I dunno why but I felt like I've got a lot today, tho I woke up at 11 a.m., went just for swimming and covering the cooking class. One thing for sure, I am blessed and thankful for that each day :)
Bless you all too, my friends!

I hadn't dreamt of anything gadget for quite some time, but this morning when I walked toward the office I met a colleague by accident in transjakarta bus and saw him unloaded his white Panasonic Lumix GF2 and fell in love right away!


Few days ago I walked past a camera shop and saw the ad of Olympus Pen and I thought, this camera would surely fit me, since I love taking pictures but a D-SLR is way too big and complicated for me, and all of my digicams are broken. More over, this camera is pocket sized but carries all the quality of a D-SLR that provides my photography needs.

My colleague, being a managing editor of a gadget magazine, recommended the Lumix to Pen, and I think I'll go for his recommendation. Only, I still need to save some bucks to bring this dream into my handbag (or would somebody buy me this?) I definitely putting this onto my 2011 resolution list. iPad, please wait in turn because I fall in love with the camera more. Lol.

I went to Senayan City after office hour yesterday to meet my aunt and we watched this fantastic singing and dancing movie called Burlesque (starred Cher and Christina Aguilera). This isn't just another musical movie, this is movie about singing and dancing world, the luxurious musical and theatrical parody in "the Best View on the Sunset Strip" even they have no window.

Burlesque itself, taken its name from Italian burla (jest) or Latin burra (trifle) then from Italian burlesco or Spanish burla (joke), is a humorous theatrical entertainment involving parody and sometimes qrotesque exaggeration (wikipedia) and had been popular in France, Italy, Spain, Britain, America, Australia and many others. This is definitely not a striptease or hooker club, this is all about high art, classical meets exotic kind of stage performance of an opera in a broad, often risqué style from the original form.

For fans of singing, dancing and performancing, I highly recommend this movie to be watched. This has a bit of Moulin Rouge, Chicago and Nine, combined with the fabulous voices of both Cher and Christina collaborated, plus their magnificent stage performance. Gosh, this movie is surely a must-see!

I got these new blogger friends and here are their links:

I had a terrific long sleep last weekend from Joey's late night's 24th birthday celebration at Beer Garden, Kemang, and woke up at around 12 p.m. on Saturday. I went to the receptionist and found Be Stong Indonesia #16 (the writer's charity program from nulisbuku with my short story in it) were there. I opened the package so lighthearted for I've been waiting for the books for a month already.




As arranged before, Isman came to fetch me and my sister to go to Central Jakarta zipcode. We had tea-break meals at Kopitiam Oey at Jl. Sabang where I had a mouthwatering french toast with maple syrup and cinnamon garnish. My sister had a talua bread with egg and smoked beef dip, Isman had a srikaya toast bread and we also ordered singkong with the extraordinarily delicious sambal roa. The place is also a unique old peranakan interior. This is truly a nice dining experience.


After that, we went to Plaza Indonesia to visit Aksara for their sale items. We met Aunt Magda there and had dinner at Zenbu for their marvelous mozaru and cheese tofu menu. We took a little tour around the mall before going home. I met my aunt again on Sunday, also with Aunt Dewi and Oma for lunch at Puri Mall for a brief. For the closing of the weekend, we had a long macaroni with cheese and mushroom sauce we made for dinner with Clemy, Isman and Bent. It was such a nice togetherness we seldom do lately :)

Thank God for giving me such a wonderful family and food!

Yes, I went back to Bandung last weekend. Only now, my whole family gathered there, too. So I arrived in Bandung on Saturday morning and had Cheryl and Rachelle fetched me. We headed to PVJ straight away and had lunch at Zenbu. Not too long after, my friend Irma and husband, Yanto, came by and joined us for about 1-2 hours.

After they went home, Alex came up and also Nalya. We moved to Black Canyon and chilled there till 6 p.m. Rachelle went home earlier so Cheryl and I went on to Legoh for dinner. Dimas and my brother Bent came over and we hung out there till 10 p.m. Finally, I came home for the first time since November 2010 (twice I was in town during the last 2 months but didn't visit home due to time limit.)

When I came home, there were Mom, my sister Clemy and boyfriend Isman. The latter two had stayed at home since Friday and I just met them at home that night. We had some conversation till around 3 a.m. and I should say that was the best family gathering we ever had since Dad was gone. We are welcoming Isman to the family and happy to have him around.


The day after, we decided to go to Ciwalk and have lunch at Pasar Tong-Tong. After finishing the Indonesian dish on budget, we took a tour around the citywalk and went home. I had a friend visited our house for a brief just after we reached home, and after some rest, we headed back to Jakarta with Isman driving. It was a very nice visit home we just did, especially with the presence of Isman who made our family merrier. :)

... but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down," sang Chumbawamba years ago. And I sing their song now for I get knocked down few days ago when my latest ex called me and said sorry that he hurt me months ago. After three months of no goodbye, he came suddenly with sending text said "please forgive me".

I called him after that, demanding explanation and what I got was a story about him and the other girl he was with for the last 3 months. Okay, that hurts, I should admit it. I cried a river and had some hard time to get back in shape. After some curhat sessions I did with some of my girls, I was recovered.

Yesterday I decided to forgive him truly, some integrity that Cheryl recommended. And it truly worked for me, that I decided to be his friend instead of his ex. I called him again and we explored the past, finding where did it went wrong and where did we lost each other.

We shared our pains, the same feeling toward different persons, but there I found my strength back. I found my solution here, by talking about my feelings and pain with him, and I was healed. By the end of our conversations, we could share some laughter and it really was a deep relief.

But then I thought about why he lost interest in me. It was because I got mad often and he didn't like it. I remembered that I was once a lovely, gentle girl before this strong, independent, bold woman emerged from within. I used to be the type of a girl he would love, but now I became a 'monster' of too tough a woman for him.

As what Yodi said the other day, that we are products of our parents, I am too, a product of my parents. I used to be much more like Daddy but Mom's character influenced me more nowadays. She taught me to be in control, not to be dependent to anyone, and to get whatever I want whatever it takes. And remember that I went to Catholic schools where rules are to be obeyed.

Can't blame anyone here. I am my mother's daughter and my ex was being him. Perhaps a too-mature me don't match a too-immature him, but that's the way it is and it didn't work out the way we expected. That's the reality I need to deal with and leave behind, while another path of future is waiting. This is part of my life story, but as always, a lot of things here are learnt well.

I didn't have any plan for last weekend except to meet a potential client in the morning. But when I had a chat with my best friend Rachelle, I felt a sudden feeling of missing her so bad that I decided to go to Bandung and see her. I went last Saturday after the meeting and arrived in Bandung at 3.15 p.m.

Cheryl picked me up and we both went to PVJ. There, we met Rachelle and the three of us had dinner at Qua-Li. It was such a great pleasure that I had, meeting these lovely girls that night. I've been missing them a lot since my last visit on mid-December.

We also met Dimas at Javana Bistro where he and his friends were chilling out. Erland, James and Ijal were there and I got my old friend, Claudia, came with her boyfriend Dipo. She is going to make me some art so she came to discuss it with me. It was very nice to meet her again after so long that night.

Then after all people went, the four of us--me, Rachelle, Cheryl and Dimas--continued the night to Patio, a new hangout place in Jl. Riau. There we spent another round of pizza till 2 a.m. and when the resto was closing, I went on with Rachelle to stay over at her place. We had some girl talk till around 4 a.m.

We couldn't wake up the morning after and was fully awake at around 11 a.m. We had brunch and lunch also with Rachelle's parents at the backyard porch, where they put a dining table facing the beautiful tropical garden and I had fun talking with the parents. It had been quite some time since the last time I felt the warmth of a family. And her mom made some feast of Manadonese food I enjoyed very much.

After some goodbyes and blessings, I left the Kandou's home and headed to Toko You for some afternoon break. Mom and her two friends came and we had  some tea for about an hour. Then, came the time for me to get back to reality: I have to leave the town immediately by another Cititrans bus at 6 p.m.

I got this list from my designer and writer friend, Oen's blog. This reminds me a lot of friendster where we used to send random stuff to all our networks... I even forgot the names of each section at the net but well, here is an intermezzo so you don't get too tired of reading 'heavy' stuff in here. Lol. Get ready for this: 

BOLD WHAT YOU LIKE:
1) Striped > I love striped pajamas, shirt and boxer. In blue. Lol
2) Winter vacation. > Wish I can have one
3) Minty breath. > Hmm. So fresh! 
4) Warm hands. > I usually have mine cold, so warm is preferred
5) Sublime.
6) Proving people wrong. > Somehow it delivers some satisfaction.  
7) Sketching. > I'm a designer!
8) Steel drums.
9) Tampons. > They're simply practical. 
10) The Sims 2. > How can I not love it?? :p 
11) Kissing. > Who doesn't? 
12) Backpacks.
13) Cloudy weather. > Perfect time to have a nap :) 
14) Picking out presents for people.
15) Kevin Flamme. 
16) Boys. > :) :) :)
17) Old movies.
18) Reminiscing.
19) Mario Party.
20) Orange juice.
21) Interesting people. > Sure!
22) Late-night texting. > It's some kind of my lullaby lately..
23) Cool teachers.
24) Levi jeans.
25) The city bus. > I like it better than the 'Busway' tho it's underfacilited
26) Cardigans.
27) Sneezing.
28) Drinking cold water. > Only when the weather is hot.
29) Finding money in my pockets. 
30) Making connections. > My expertise. Lol..
31) Books. > I believe all agree that I adore books more than fashion. 
32) Bolding surveys.
33) A clean bedroom.
34) Collages.
35) Meeting people. > It's like my hobby. Haha.
36) Comfortable positions. 
37) Headphones.
38) Marathons.
39) Packing to go somewhere.
40) Mascara. > A girl's basic need when going out ;)
41) Daydreaming. > For idea and inspiration, for I'm a writer.
42) Possibilities. > Definitely.
43) Ramen. > I want some Gokana Teppan or Shin Men!
44) Notepads. > Need them so bad anywhere I go..
45) Burt’s Bees.
46) Babysitting.
47) Actually getting homework done.
48) Feeling good about myself. > It's the best feeling in the world!
49) Complimenting people. > Giving another satisfaction to myself..
50) Post Secret.
51) Confiding in people.
52) Themed things. > It's nice to see things in order..
53) T shirts.
54) Gentlemen. > D'oh!! How can I not love them??
55) Singing harmonies. > I love music so much I can't live without
56) Being surprised. > I love surprises! Anything out of ordinary
57) New clothes. > Delivers new spirit somehow..
58) Target. > The target of goal or Target department store? I need goals.
59) Long eyelashes. > They're simply marvelous
60) Bright Eyes. > Reflecting bright mind and future, too!
61) Naps.
62) Nicely-dressed boys. 
63) Barack Obama. > One inspiring, charming guy
64) Tweezed eyebrows. > So damn fake!
65) Inside jokes. > I hope people know it when I'm joking, not all-time sarcastic
66) Eye-contact. > Building trust between two people
67) Acronyms.
68) Thinking. > Tho it takes a lot of energy, I can't help not doing it
69) Animals.
70) Collecting turtles.
71) Understanding. > We need this to love something/someone better
72) Friendship bracelets.
73) Meaningful items. > They stay in my heart longer
74) Simon & Garfunkel. > "Sounds of Silence" was Dad's favorite!
75) Silly pictures.
76) Raspberries.
77) Not going to school.
78) Star Trek.
79) Reading blogs. > Ahaha...
80) Showering away problems.
81) Worn-in shoes.
82) Paranormal televison shows.
83) Facebook chat.
84) Baked ziti. > Yumm!! :)
85) Visiting my elementary school.
86) Soft blankets. > And warm ones too, since I chill easily..
87) Big words.
88) Staying up late. > I just can't go to sleep early.. oh why?
89) Second chances. > Who doesn't want this?
90) Piggy-back rides.
91) Saying words over and over until they sound really strange. > I do this sometimes..
92) Surrealism. > Anything absurd is on my way
93) The feeling of relief after going pee. >:">
94) Home videos. > More comfortable than having to go to theatres
95) Unusual names. > It's somehow cute and unique
96) Diving boards.
97) Smilies. > It's a cure!
98) Cats. > Hate them to the bottom!
99) Feeling better. > Actually, I prefer "feeling best"
100) Considerate people.

My friend Ratih and sister Clemy made me watch this funny movie My Life in Ruins. It's just the sort of drama comedy that will instantly light up your day, especially because it's located in Greece, one of the most romantic, philosophic, and must-visit place ever. When I see Georgia in the set, I see myself for the past few years. Or for the freshest memory, she was me on New Year Eve.

I know that I look too absurd by cutting almost all of my hair at the very end of year 2010. It feels funny though. This is like the shortest hair I've ever wear since my 6th grade. First, I felt fresh. It was like being reborn into a new person, but it's still the same old me inside. It's just releasing some stress away and replacing it with new vibe. I felt like brand new and this is a good feeling.

But then whenever I look at the mirror, it's like looking at somebody I never knew. It's like looking at a part of me I've never known. I now look both tomboy and edgy, no longer the sweet and elegant Victoria I think I used to be (since my British granny always told me to look like a lady.) Some of my friends said I look much more like Mom now. Lol. She's totally the opposite character of mine.

Yodi said the other day that children are products of their parents. Whatever the parents are, the parents do, the parents say will be reflected on their descendants. For as long as I know, I was the extreme opposite of Mom who is extra-independent, super-Mom kind of a woman, someone who is both tough and gentle, bold and lovable. Someone who is not me.

But lately, I think I left my feminine, soft character and becoming into my Mom. I dress like her, think like her and now behave like her. I take things much more easily or in the most common language known as "cool". I don't give a damn about what people think about me and I don't really care about what they do. As long as they don't disturb me, I don't disturb them.

I see life is much easier to live, and the world has became a better place for me to be. I was such a misfit anywhere I go, but lately, I've found my dwelling place. I had made myself my own shelter and feel comfortable enough being in it. I set my own goals and rules and live by it. I see myself

But sometimes, certain people still make me feel insecure. It's funny how your haircut can make you think about things around you, and more above that, about yourself. That's what I'm dealing with recently, having dialogue with myself inside of my brain about my hair vs character. It's so unimportant I think, but I do it somehow, in my spare time, on my way to the office.. Lol. I'm going crazy!

On new year eve, I spent the whole evening with my friends at Joey's photo studio. Vicy, my new friend, picked me up at around 4 p.m. just after I cut my hair at the salon. She and I had some conversation and found out that both of us share the same tribe of Banten (West Java) and same given title of Ratu (title of Bantenese royal family--Tubagus for men and Ratu for women--which stops at Bagus, son of a Ratu). And her house in Anyer is not too far from my family's land. It's so nice to find a friend with similar background, though we are actually a completely different persons.

Then I saw Vicy posing lightly and cheerfully in front of the camera with my other friends, too, but I couldn't compare her. Dunno why but I couldn't see myself fit in there. I felt like I didn't belong there, between those beautiful carved faces and bods. I felt inferior between them, that's why I withdrew myself. Joey said it was just a matter of self confident. I didn't have it. I dunno why but I couldn't be confident that night.

When I think about it now, it's more about me being too uptight. I think about stuff too much and I let them get me. I have to loose up and open up just like Georgia did in the movie, so I can be as freely as Vicy. When I see her character, I envy her a little bit. Her slow reaction and fragile figure--which can be said sexy for some people but anorexic-looking for others--somehow makes guys wanna be the man who will fight for her honor (had too much of the song, are you? Lol)
... then I thought, why should I try so hard of being an independent one like Mom?

Perhaps I was indeed in a middle of brief character-crisis that night, with my new short hair and beside a skinny beautiful model, with too much beer consumed and terribly bad habit of insomnia. But now I got my self confidence back. I feel more okay now with this super short cut and I think I'm gonna stay short for a while, maybe for 1-2 years. After that, I'm gonna have my long hair back, so enjoy my sporty look now, friends ;)

I just had my first shopping on the first Sunday of 2011 with Mom and siblings today. We went to Puri Indah Mall and I just spent some of my salary and some of my Christmas gift from Mom on a vintage leather postman-bag and a pair of Oxford-y shoes and a pink 60's-pop-colored tumbler for my water supply on the road. The next day, I went to Grand Indonesia with my sister and found an extra stunning pair of washed slim fit jeans at Pull & Bear and bought them right away to complete my vintage wardrobe.
I love these stuff and I love to share it with you. Hope you enjoy this ;)

I haven't made my 2011 resolutions, so here they are:

1. Be positive for all the time. Be grateful always.
2. Be a fully true vegetarian for much healthier life
3. Add up yet another 50 new friends, network along the year
4. Learn a new language. Language of love, probably? Lol.
5. Get a salary raise and some promotion at work
6. Leaving legacies, even more than last year. I need to proof myself to the world
7. Maintain my interior design little company with my sister and Mom
8. Publish a novel (Lol. This had been my resolutions for few years past)
9. Go to Thailand with my friend Rachelle. This had been our dream since forever
10. Get new tattoo(s) since I failed made one last year...