Another Victoria's Secrets

My aunt gave me a perfume today, something she got and doesn't like, but appeared quite nice to me. It's sweet and fresh, perhaps something I need most these days--to keep fresh. Well, not bad tho, I don't really buy perfume, got all mine from Mom all the time. So, thanks ET for the perfume, I believe I'll be sweeter with it. LOL!

During my Latvian guests' visit last November, I learned about some stuff from them:

1. Young people perform folklore dance every Saturday on the city hall.
2. Latvia has forest in their country, therefore wooden furniture is one of their businesses.
3. Most of them don't smoke, they live such a good and healthy life.
4. Their language came from India, a long time ago, so it sounds not too different with Indonesian.
5. The city they live in, Jelgava, populated by only 64,000 people, while Bandung inhabits 7,400,000 people. No wonder they didn't agree when I say Bandung is a small town here (compared to Jakarta). LOL.

I was discussing this matter with my best friend, Cheryl. I told her that I don't like to go out with certain friends and prefer to go with the others. I didn't know why at first, but I just realized the reason now. It's that I don't get anything from going with the first group: neither the fun nor knowledge, and not networking too. It's like wasting my time, energy and money for some useless gossiping stuff, and I don't like that.

This issue is strongly related to my recent posts, concerning about my consideration of having/going with the guy I deleted from my BBM contact list (and his friends) and also about the nerdy. It isn't about their education or social class at first, but then it's gonna relate to the root, which are the education and social class. But the main thing is that they aren't bringing any benefit to me, and it's just such a waste of time to go out without gaining anything. At least the fun, if not the knowledge or network.

So it's true what my brother said that I tend to like people from the way they think. I choose only the most fun, smart, and have a broad mind to be around me, especially those who I consider best friends and the one I have a crush on. I love being with open-minded people, because I can always learn something from them. I love to learn anything new, and this ending of the year excites me just more, for we'll have a whole new year soon!

1. First, it's in the way they look. It's kinda obvious by their face, thick glasses and how they're dressed.
2. Then, surely the way they talk. It's just the least kind of people that can get me (or perhaps anyone) interested on listening, let alone getting into a conversation with.
3. And the topic they choose for a chat. Either it's too light or too heavy, it's just too standard and typical and boring. Ever have a nerd tries to sell fashion item to you? Yep, the first place to seek for stilettos, mod dress and skinny jeans, huh?
4. They are giving informations a year old as if they're the first to know. Who doesn't know that Mark Zuckerberg and Eduardo Saverin are the founders of Facebook? Come on, don't tell me you don't watch Social Network!
5. They are just too easy to read and be guessed, and their pick-up lines are so outdated. They just can't hide their emotions or act cool, made it more boring to me. Fact is, they made me just feeling uncomfortable and a little scared. It's just best to be far away from them.

G'aahhhh, I so dislike them nerdies! Sadly, it's still in the blood. I have a nerd cousin and more geeks in the family (I'm one of the geeks for sure), so I can't really complaint here. Only, don't let them get too near too often please, I'd go crazy!

We just had a great Christmas festive at house, the first since years, even when Dad was still around. The fact that many of our family were coming just added more fun to it, plus that the family of Isman (Clemy's boyfriend) and family of Martin (Anna's boyfriend) were joining us, made us fulfilled with the joyful spirit of Christmas.


So on 24th we got Aunt Dewi, Oma, Aunt Sisca, Goldi and Isman's family (his Mom--Tante Melly, his uncle--Oom Alex, and his cousin--Wendy). We had barbeque at 8 p.m. and in the next day we had the exact same group plus Aunt Ning, Aunt Ellen, Uncle Patrick, Aunt Paula, Andrew, Anna, Martin, and Martin's parents. Quite a party, huh?

This is a very awesome song that moved everyone in the room, and me too! The video explains all, so just watch it!

My youngest cousin, Angelika, was staying here for two nights at the beginning of the week. There's one sure thing to happen when she's around, is the never-ending photo session, most of them are narcistic. Her photos just took most of my camera and laptop memory, and our walks around the mall were full of looking for gorgeous things, some try-ons, and many other window-shopping stuff.

It was so teenager, but it brought back the childlike in me. She let my reckless, spontaneous self out again, and it felt really good, for I am the oldest child and grandchild in Mom's family. I am so used of getting the most responsibility, acting as a leader and as a good example for my brother, sister and especially the cousins. I forgot how to be reckless and alive. Angelika brought me back there and I'm so thankful ;)

As promised, Sunny Soon gave me an invitation for two persons for his second movie, Demi Ucok. The movie is produced by Sammaria Simanjuntak, talking about the Bataknese mother who wants her daughter to marry another Bataknese before she dies--while her daughter prefers to pursue her dream to make a movie. It's just so typical Indonesian parents to want their children to get married young, and it's being underlined by taking Bataknese as the cultural background.

So I went with Maria at 6.30 p.m. and got all wet by rain all the way to the basketball field in the middle of the slum area. It was quite some trip, and they got hawker food stalls there, ready to serve us all we want, from cotton candy to meatballs, from sekoteng to rice porridge. And the screen was a very traditional outdoor one, with huge white tent to save us from the pouring rain.


Maria and I enjoyed the movie and the whole program so much, although we got all so wet and knew almost no one there at first. But then Sunny Soon came at around 8 p.m., just before the movie started, and at the end of the show we greeted Maria's cousin-in-law-to-be who happened to be the nephew of the mother of the main character, Mak Gondut (who is also real mother of the producer).

It was such a great time I had with my girlfriend, I'm just so glad that we have each other while other girls are busy with either work or family. It's nice that I always have someone beside me, tho the person can vary. LOL. Well I'm just so glad that I'm not exactly alone at this time of my life, especially when I feel down so often. Friends are angels in human form sent from Above, and I'm just so glad to have them around.


Anyway, I met another old friend when we were on the way back to the car. It was a group of boys and I was thinking how scary it was to walk there for us girls, when my name was called, loud and clear on that small alley. It was someone I knew from God, Inc. and he lives there in the neighborhood. I just met Wansund, Ale, Kadut and others from the Heartbreak Station TV the night before, and meeting Cuki tonight just completed the session. Well, my days are just getting better and better!

P.S. This movie still needs fund to make their way to the theater, so why not helping them at www.demiapa.com where you can help by only IDR 100,000 and get merchandises and your name on the movie poster? That'd be cool, I say ;)

I've been wanting to have gloves since I was a kid and failed to get them last Christmas. So this year, to save me from tears, I bought a pair of this brown suede gloves from Promod. I simply love the natural color, the soft material and the chic braided leather bracelet as an accent around the wrist. I think I wouldn't want anything more for Christmas because these gloves just perfected everything!

My schoolmate, Ryan (a.k.a. Iyank) came to Bandung so I set time to meet him at Sapulidi, where I brought Mom to meet Mr. Bob. There was a party being held there, people were sitting with some fine dining and wine and a band was playing Beatles' songs. There was Acil when I came around 10 p.m. then Iyank came with Tio, Audi, Kelvin and Firman about an hour later. The group are fixie bikers from Jakarta, except for Firman who lives in Bandung.

Anyway, the night went on and we moved to Sobbers and had the rest of the fun there, met Sandi--a friend of Pompink's--and her friends, as were Rein, Dobleh, and Dian from Salute bar. It was quite fun to watch people who were enjoying their moments too much and we imitated them for fun, till it was nearly 2 a.m. and Mom asked to be picked up at Kafe Halaman. It was such a great night, such a refreshing to have Iyank and his friends around :)

Maybe most of my weariness lately can be described in this one song by Sara Bareilles here. I am just so tired to fall into his gravity all over and over again... all I want is to be set free. Really, this endless weariness is exhausting!

You hold me without touch. 

You keep me without chains. 

I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your reign. 

CHORUS 

Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity. 

Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be. 

But you're on to me and all over me. 

You loved me 'cause I'm fragile. 

When I thought that I was strong. 

But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone. 

CHORUS 

Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity. 

Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be. 

But you're on to me and all over me. 

I live here on my knees as I 

Try to make you see that you're 

Everything I think I need here on the ground. 

But you're neither friend nor foe though I 

Can't seem to let you go. 

The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down

You're keeping me down, yeah, yeah, yeah

You're onto me, onto me and all over

Something always brings me back to you

It never takes too long

It was a really short call when Judy was in Bandung. My phone was off so I got her message about an hour after she sent it, and her phone was off when I tried to reach her. So I drove to RM. Legoh where she said she was, and met her with Grandy. It was all gambling to meet here there without any confirmation, but apparently God wanted us to meet, so I didn't come there for nothing.

After some meal, we moved to Camden, had some beers and dr. Lihan, their friend, joined us. The place was very much crowded so we decided to move to Gossip Bar to meet Randy, another friend of mine. The other two girls went home earlier, leaving me and Judy with Randy, and we had some meaningful conversation till about 2 a.m. then I drove them both home.

It was really nice to have "new" people around me, especially when they are magically connected with you even we've just met a few times before. We talked about religion, about faith, destiny and the Greatest Love. We talked about life and coincidences. We talked about other little things that refreshed my mind. From my desperation, they were like lights that gave me new hopes. I hope I'll find back my muse soon!

Should there be an etiquette on BBM-ing? I just deleted one person that I felt bothering me last week and this became an issue between me and my friends. Well that person I deleted was my schoolmate, a senior in my junior high, but lately we hang out together with other of his friends, and he started texting me, and somehow I was annoyed.

Is it okay to delete a contact in your BBM list? I guess the ethic is to keep them there, no matter what--or simply never let them enter your list at all. All my life, I had deleted few of the guys, especially to those I don't feel comfortable with. I know that it ain't polite and hurt them somehow, but I think I have full control on deciding who can be on my list and those who can't.

Actually I deleted those guys aren't because I hate or dislike them. It's more that I'm afraid of them. It is true that I dislike them, but I still can deal with that. What bothers me more is the fact that they made me scared. Their attitude/lifestyle/habits aren't in my logic--not anything that I can accept--and I'm just doing a preventive action before I'm dragged even closer to that dangerous area.

I have a radar in my brain, perhaps it's working even more sensitive the past one year, I find more men are hazardous and I just take an action perhaps way too quick--or too slow that I let them add my BBM contact at first and let them hope for nothing? Well I just want a happy life so don't tell me I'm not nice if I remove those that made me feel uncomfortable, I'm just trying to keep my world 'clean' and joyful. I need only positive stuff here!

If you like doing laps in the swimming pool, you might want to stock up on the energy drinks before diving in to this one. It is more than 1,000 yards long, covers 20 acres, had a 115ft deep end and holds 66 million gallons of water.

By courtesy of Oom Pryana.

I'm going crazy to see how this bird responded to human's questions and orders. It's amazing how animal can speak human language these days. Perhaps the world is really getting to its end.

This is a Japanese super slim house, designed by Mizuishi Architecture firm from Tokyo, built on triangular 50 sqm area only. I think this is pretty much applicable in Indonesia for those who crowd Jakarta and other big towns. Photographer: Hiroshi Tanigawa.

I was meeting Agatha at Toko You yesterday at 4 p.m. and met Mr. Sony for some business talk. I tweeted the location, and surprisingly people were responding to that. First, Roro came and joined us. Roro was a friend I hadn't met for more than five years--it was so nice to see her again after so long. I had to fetch my brother at office, but we came back within 20 minutes.

After that, people were coming and joining our table, started with Danis, Maria, Chika, Otto, and Bona... Then another group came after the first one went home. Andrew, Romulus, Radit, Nirwan 'Tongo', Rony 'Calo', Hendrik 'Sinyos' joined later, making me and Agatha the only ones who stayed the longest there. I planned to come home by at least 8 p.m. but the temptation to stay and gather won the battle, so I stayed till midnight and had great laughter with all my dear friends. It was just so fun to have so many friends :)

by courtesy of Om Sony, owner of Toko You, Bandung.

It had been centuries of years since I was on a date and last Sunday, I went on one. It was a bit awkward, since my date was my childhood friend. I got a couple of free tickets for movie and I got no one else to go to movie with. So there we were, on a date--because it was just the two of us and there was an after meal at Erla's Mexican Cafe and we talked till 1 a.m.--and I was so happy to have the feeling again. I dunno if this is something that lasts or not, I'd been liking him since our elementary years, but I really dunno about the present and future. Let's just see about this! :)

By the way, the movie was based on true story of Sam Childers, a sinner who found God and got his redemption on saving orphanages in Sudan, Africa. His fight and struggle on the children was an inspiring one and I was deeply touched when watching this. This is one of the must-seen movie I highly recommend!

I went to Albert's party last Friday and had fun for his pre-wedding BBQ party. Most of the guests are friends from MADC, and I brought Maria my BFF along with her little brother Kevin, had fun till about midnight. Maria drove me home, we had late lunch at Tokyo Connection and accompanied Kevin to doctor before went to Congo. It was such a great day!


The next day, I went to meet Arnatt and girlfriend at RM Legoh, then waited for Alvin and Wahyu at 9 p.m. to go to Motzen. There were already Gindra, Andru, Karlina, Lala and Jeremy. It was very nice because Alvin, Wahyu and Jeremy are living on the same hill with me--I'm glad we get along so well. At the other table were Otto, Agatha, Stanny and their friends. Later, Daniel and wife Elnia joined us. We stayed there till about 2 a.m. and I was so happy!

Let me tell you a bit about girl's heart system. I just met Maria--my elementary years' BFF--on Saturday and it felt like no years had passed since 1996. We just got along so well like the old days and we had some catching up with our lives and we agreed to one thing. I also met Cheryl--my current BFF--last night and discussed about similar thing with the one I had with Maria.

So, I think a woman is capable to love a guy her heart desires so much with all of her heart. So much, that she can give all to him and most of time, when the guy is not so much a gentleman, irritates him. In this case, the guy tends to run away for he's not ready to be involved in such a serious, intense, intimate relationship.

But, once the trust is damaged, the heart is torn apart and the same mistake is repeated, the love stops. Perhaps it's not really stopped, but we girls have a system of surviving, how to avoid the same heart break and as our shield is getting thicker and stronger, we are getting harder to be reached. And once the door is closed, it's a very small chance to get open again. Perhaps a window would open for some chat, but the door is most likely to remain closed.

I don't know with other girls--I assume most of them are like me--but it's so hard for me to like two or more guys at the same time. So if I move on and date another guy, that should be the end of my liking on the previous one. That was when I really close the door and will consider carefully on opening a window.

I used to delay my "door closing" moment to years when I had to do that many years before, but experience taught me that when a door is closed, it's closed. There was no loose ends, even if there are some unfinished business to us. For them, it's finished and there ain't nothing else to talk about. Things will go differently and both of you will never be the same again. Re-opening a door for one person is a useless to me. Second (and third and so on...) chances are better be given before it's really closed.

So yea I guess that's pretty much how a girl's system works. Or maybe, a sanguine-phlegmatic Piscean girl's. Or maybe, just mine. Well at least that's what I'm thinking when I recall my most recent heart break case... I just need to move on and start on dating new people, close a door behind me to open another one. Life is always changing, the wheel is always spinning. Tho love is always the same, the guys don't always stay. We just need to be wise with our hearts ;)

Everybody must have their own time of desperation, and mine comes just recently. The reasons may be simple, but I guess these are why:

1. I am lack of friends. They are either getting married or drown with their own works and businesses. Getting new ones are never a problem, but still you can't replace a person with another.
2. Mom tells me to settle down, like every time she has the opportunity of saying. I know what I'm dealing with and what I need. I don't need people to tell it to my face all the time it just bore me out.
3. My job as a freelancer, projects are pending and my income is never certain. Still, I need money and need it to be fixed regularly.
4. This country has never be my home. I have my house and family here, but I don't feel like I belong here and this is killing me for I am always an alien here and I have no one understands me. Even the only person who does, doesn't care about me.
5. I dunno where or how to ask for help. My pride and ego had taken control of my life and I just can't lower down my standards.

Life's a bitch for sure. But I am truly helpless here I need to get out immediately or I'm going out of my mind and rotten up slowly...