Another Victoria's Secrets

Adit, Dita, Juno, Cecep and me

This trip was from last week. Just after the Balangan trip, we went on another trip the next day. As Shasya went home the night after Balangan, the remaining group was Adit and Cecep. But Adit got his best friend Dita and her Korean friend Juno along with us. So the five of us went far to the easternmost regency of Bali: Karangasem.




First, we stopped by at Taman Ujung. It is the magnificent water palace built in 1909 by King of Karangasem, I Gusti Bagus Jelantik or Anak Agung Anglurah Ketut Karangasem. Dutch architect van Den Hentz and Chinese architect Loto Ang worked together with an undagi (calling for Balinese architect). The water palace belongs to the palace but they allow public like us to come and visit.



So we walked around the 10 hectares land that has a big rectangle pond and a house in the middle of it. There is also a post on the higher part of the garden where we can see the view of Mount Agung, eastern sea and the whole complex of the water palace. We should climb hundreds of stairs to get there (you can see me taking all those stairs on the clip below) but the sight is extremely rewarding.



After spending two hours at Taman Ujung, we went on to Amed. We stopped by at Sunset Point on top of the cliff after the Jemeluk Bay, and moving on for our initial destination: snorkeling. There is a vintage mail post drowned about 50 meters from the shore and we could peek into the corals and fishes through the goggles.


It was a nice experience--and I'm saying this because I'm not a fan of underwater world. Perhaps if you love the seas so much you'd spend hours inside there and find more stuff than what I saw there and you could say it was marvelous. I spent only about 10 minutes in the waters and it was too late for snorkeling. The best time to do this is in the morning with lots of sunlight that gets into the water. Please don't blame me.


Anyway, check the clip below to see how Taman Ujung and Amed look like from up above:

Lately I've been traveling with a poet/videographer friend Putu Aditya Nugraha. He is a Balinese 'social media influencer' who just started his vlog--or travlog as it is a travel vlog. So we had fun and he documented all of our trips on videos. It is also a way for us to promote (Balinese) tourism--that Bali isn't just about beaches. This one, though, was from our trip last week to Balangan Beach, Ungasan, South Bali. We went with food blogger Shasya Pashatama and another twitter influencer Cecep. Enjoy the clip!

I forgot to announce it here; my friends and I managed to settle a new web containing information about Bali and how to survive living there. The target is domestic (Indonesian) immigrants or backpackers, that's why it's written in Indonesian. But if you wanna ask anything about it in English, just send email to balihacks@gmail.com.

Basically it's all based on our experience being immigrants in Bali as well, so we'd like to share some info with the newbies. The web was launched on October 22, so it's just a week old now (;

Check it here.

This island is my home.

Since 2012 I've been going back and forth from Jakarta to Bali, trying to settle down on my own. Yes, I much prefer to live in Bali, but somehow I still have some kind of emotional bond with my hometown that made me have to go back to Jakarta once in a while. I don't really have much here except that I rent a studio apartment to stay and a motorbike to get me places. These have made me claiming Bali to be a place that I call home.

I may not get to live here forever either; who knows where life would lead you to, right?
But having to always missing Bali every time I'm away makes me ask myself this question: why do I love Bali so much? What's keeping me in this beautiful island? Why does it always calling me to come back, even that I didn't grow up here?

So I'm listing my reasons here, of why Bali is such a home for me:

1. Every place is within reach: the city, beaches, mountains, lakes, cliffs, forests, rice fields, waterfalls, temples.. I can simply ride a motorbike within 2 hours to get to every tourism destination and don't even have to stay over the night if I go early in the morning. And it's easy to rent a car if I'm not in the mood for a bike ride. Also, they're affordable!
2. Everybody is here: the local Balinese, migrants from all over Indonesia, tourists from all over the world.. It's the best place to meet everyone and learn about the world from them. Plus, almost everyone is going for a holiday or work in Bali, and eventually you'll meet your friends or reunite with old mates here. One can never be lonely in Bali.
3. Everything is so serene: Most of Balinese are Hindu and the religion taught peace, karma, and love. I think these are the foundation to such peaceful life--the peace that starts from within. Although it's not so good when it comes to business (that people are so slow here) but it's good for soul (and heart) repairing. The 'Bali therapy' is simply what tired souls need.
4. Freedom for everyone. I just feel free from any judgment, moral obligation, or any social system that applies in both Jakarta and Bandung where I lived. I can wear any outfit that I want, from bikini and flip-flops to evening dress and high heels. I can stay single and befriends with anyone, I can go all week or stay at home.. But most importantly, I'm stress-free!
5. I can focus on myself. Being away from the family means more time for myself. It's not that I don't care about my family; in fact I care too much that I need the space and time to be on my own to keep my balance. I am a loner sometimes, and I need my solo moment once in a while. Being in Bali, with all my physical, emotional, and social needs fulfilled, is a blessing.

via wikihow

Great friendship is certainly a place where you can talk, discuss and have fun about anything together. You can read how to keep the friendship here. But from my own experiences, here are the 5 reasons why cross-gender friendship is failing.. or 5 things to avoid if you want to keep your heterogeneous friendship to go on:

1. Undetermined feelings

For me it's easy to know the difference between friendship and love: if you want to fuck their mind/character/soul but don't want to deal with any of their physical (body, family, occupation, social status, financial condition, and so on), then s/he is your best friend. In the opposite, if you just want to fuck their body and not their soul, it's clearly just lust and does not worth any of friendship or serious relationship. Once you can recognize your own feeling toward them, you can set boundaries and define how you treat them--as friends.

2. Undefined positions

Now that you know your feelings, you have to let them know. Make clear boundaries, treat them right, or even discuss it with them. Never flirt or give false hope. If the other party is the one who has feeling more than friendship, make sure they got the message and give them time to neutralize their feeling. If you're the one who like them more but they consider you just as friend, get yourself some distance and get new circle of friends until you are certain you have a mutual platonic feeling. If you can't get rid of that feeling, it's going to be hard to maintain a friendship.

3. Physical touch

Avoid unnecessary hugs, embraces, or any kind of touch. Limit it only for greetings and not more than that. Avoid sensual touches, even when they are crying their heart out. Don't lend them a shoulder to cry on if you know it could mislead their feelings. Show or tell them your empathy to their situation in a proper amount but don't get carried away. Give the logical or emotional solutions they need, but don't give the kind of touch they crave for. Let them seek for it someplace else; not from you.

4. Romantic situation

Don't go to romantic places or intimate situation together. If you want to have a one-on-one conversation, do it in public places or if it's at either one's house, do it at the living room or kitchen, and make sure there are other people around. If things are getting hotter, simply leave the room. Keep yourself away from them for a while if you must. Do anything that can keep your relationship as casual as you can by giving time and space to keep it cool.

5. Excluding your partners

If either or both of you have significant others, acknowledge this friendship to the partner(s) and include them in it. If your partner doesn't approve, tell your friend about the condition so they could at least make an effort to win your partner's heart. Or vice versa: try to befriend your friend's partner if they tend to be suspicious on you. True friends should always have each others' back, even when they need to be away from their lives for a while. Don't worry about that: the people who really care for you won't leave your life no matter what!