Another Victoria's Secrets

me, Albeta, Maria and Alex

Yesterday I went to Kemang for brunch at 10 a.m. with my schoolmates from Bandung: Albeta, Alex and Maria. At first we went to Sophie Authentique Splash at Jl. Kemang Utara but it was packed so we moved to the first branch at Jl. Kemang Selatan. We had a brunch until 1 p.m. and shared stories to catch up with our latest life story. It was actually a really fun thing to do, this brunch thing, instead of having lunch/dinner meeting, especially to start a long day with.

the first Sophie Authentique at Jl. Kemang Selatan

Sophie Authentique was started as home industry bakery that based on order and delivery since 2010. After three years, an opportunity came and the first bakery parlor was set at Jl. Kemang Selatan. The business was building great, consumer's accepting this positively and soon two other outlets were opened at Jl. Kemang Utara (Splash) and Jl. Cipete Raya.

can't help finding this cute swing stood idle

the warm, inviting, small bakery / café parlour

our breakfast: tuna salad, pork pâté authentique and butter sugar crêpe

Sophie Authentique
+62 21 7180011 - Open 8.00 a.m.-5.00 p.m.

• Jl. Kemang Selatan
  
• Splash Kemang, Jl. Kemang Utara
• Jl. Cipete Raya

@authentiquejkt

The Nine Brothers

On Saturday, on Oct 3, 2015, I attended the big family reunion from my father's bloodline. This is a Bantenese family association started by Thung Ho Boen, the sixth generation from one of Bantenese heroes, Sultan Ageng Tirtayasa. He had 9 sons and 3 daughters, and all of the sibling's descendants are gathered in Kioe Seng Tong association (which means "the Social Society of the Living Nine Brothers"--who carried the surname).

photo backdrop

The group name was updated into Keluarga Serumpun Tirta (which means the Tirta Cognate Family, to keep the KST abbreviation) in 2011 to avoid the use of Chinese language, according to the rules applied and filled with lots and various form of Tirta or Thung (which both mean "water") as last surnames.

some of the extended family we rarely meet

The big reunion was held at Hotel 101 at Jl. Surya Kencana, Bogor, located right in front of the family heritage house. We arrived at 7.45 a.m. but the event was started at 9 so we still had time for buffet breakfast at the hotel's restaurant so we did. At 9 a.m. we came to the function room where big tables of 10 were already set by the ancestor's group. I came from the first son of Thung Ho Boen, which was Thung Bouw Liem, so I'm at group number 1.

group from first son's line

After some opening speech and art performance, I had time to introduce my book Gerbang Nuswantara to the big family for 30 minutes. It was the first time I had to talk in front of a large audience all by myself but the fact that they're still family calmed me down. At lunch time, many came to me to discuss about the book or order it. It was really nice that I got to know more of them, too.


To add more excitement, a couple from the eleventh' siblings greeted my brother-in-law, recognizing us because they came to my sister's wedding party. The couple are friends of Kak Mona, Maruli's sister-in-law. I know things can be complicated when it comes to family, but it's always nice to have large, extended family, isn't it?

me, speaking about Gerbang Nuswantara on stage

After lunch, Bogor mayor, Kang Bima Arya, came to the event. He is interested on preserving cultural heritage--and our family house is one of the historical building in Bogor--plus he is married to one of the Tirta's descendants from the eleventh sibling. So I spoke to him and he was interested on reading Gerbang Nuswantara, which excited me so much.

the young mayor of Bogor and I

We came back to Jakarta at 2 p.m. and reached Cipete area at around 3:30. It was very crowded on the highway but thankfully we could make it back to Jakarta earlier so we could get some rest before heading to Frank's Smokehouse & Bar for its grand opening party. They had this smoked brisket beef and pulled pork buffet bar for only IDR 100,000 and some Jell-O (with Smirnoff) shots special for that night.

smoked brisket beef, pulled pork and side dishes

We stayed at the bar till midnight with lots of booze and laughter, and introduced to some new friends. What a change of situation! We had fun that night with some blues music and I felt so great being surrounded by the people I love. I really wish more days like this to come :)

my lovely family

pardon my 'inang-inang style' but this is the best head-to-toe image that I have for my outfit on the day that I wore with a stunning purple-violet-and-golden songket from Palembang as jarik

Due to many questions I got about my gorgeous red kebaya that I wore at my sister's wedding, I'll write all that I know about kebaya here. Kebaya is Javanese traditional top clothing that were worn only by royalties in the past, while abdi dalem (servants) or commoners could only wear tube tops. The higher their status, the more complete the outfit. Kebaya is worn outside the bustier or tube top for upper part and a piece of cloth or jarik (that can be sarong/batik/tenun/songket) for lower part.

kebaya kartini and kebaya encim ~ via muziumtekstilnegara

If you like non-transparent and loose fit model of kebaya, you can find many options of the ready-to-wear kebaya at fabric / clothing markets (in Jakarta) such as Thamrin City, Pasar Baru, Mayestik, Pasar Senen... you name it. These are the places I've been to, but of course there are many others everywhere. This kind of kebaya is loose-fit and comes in many models. The one with two folds in middle (with or without brocade) with cotton / rayon fabric is called kebaya kartini (taken from the education heroine, R.A. Kartini's kebaya style) while the one with big floral embroidery (usually with pale and/or sheer material) is usually called as kebaya encim / Malay's peranakan.

kebaya kutubaru with floral fabric ~ via patriciayolanda

Another popular type of loose fit kebaya is kutubaru that came from Sunda / West Java. The difference from kebaya kartini is that kutubaru has additional part in the middle that is sewn as one-piece with the blouse but looks as if there is a tube top or camisole inside the outer clothing. The Sundanese likes to wear floral-print material for kutubaru and traditional batik for the bottom part.

Atiqah Hasiholan wearing Anne Avantie's body-fitted brocade kebaya ~ via weheartit

The latest and most stylish trend for kebaya is to have a customized fitted kebaya with brocade material. This contains of a separate camisole or bustier (the latter is much better for curvy body to enhance the body shape) and a layer of fitted soft tulle combined with brocade and is usually complemented with sequins on the brocade pattern. The ultimate types of this kind of kebaya was pioneered by Anne Avantie but you must prepare high budget for this, which starts from around Rp 30.000.000 for a short kebaya.

via adamjuneau

If your budget is lower than that, don't worry. You can still make your own kebaya. It is important for you to know that the (current) fee for a single kebaya making starts from Rp 250.000-Rp 4.000.000 (check the list below). This variation will (of course) depend on the quality. If you have enough budget and want something more stress-free, go to Vera Kebaya. But if you don't have that budget, take some inspiration from her Instagram / Pinterest and find yourself another kebaya-maker that is on your budget.

details of my kebaya with rainbow-red Japanese sequins on Valentino red brocade and champagne-gold bustier, made by Tina and this costs Rp 1.250.000

I have some tips here that you must be aware of if this is your first time making kebaya. Check these out:

• Buy your own fabric to make sure you get the exact color and pattern you like. The pattern of french brocade (brokat prancis) is mostly rose and floral so I recommend that you find something other than that.
• When buying fabric, the second grade (KW 2) is enough if you plan to make the full-sequined kebaya (full payet). Make sure it is stretchy to allow you to move more freely.
• You may like some factory-sequined brocade (brokat berpayet), and it will save you some budget on sewing fee but make sure your dressmaker is able to make it. Consult your dressmaker first before you purchase the fabric!
• Do not be so cheap on the budget. Remember that price (usually) speaks of its quality. The more perfect you want for your kebaya, the more money you will have to spend on it.
• Research and consult as much as you can with as many dressmakers to know the best option and price. I have narrow it down for you on the list I put below if you don't have that much of time to explore.
• Ask as many questions as possible to your dressmaker. See as many as possible of their previous kebayas; check on the seams if they have some samples or ongoing projects. Discuss to find the model that will complement your body figure, for example: high V-neckline for big busted, short or medium sleeves for young girls, etc. You can have your own will on the neckline, the front or back buttons, the type of buttons, the bottom, the sleeves and the wrist line of the sleeves. Just be creative!
• Due to my observation, female dressmakers tend to have better taste than the male, and male dressmakers tend to go more extreme on the model and color (that is risky to be tacky--but it will all depend on your taste).
• If you have slim figure, find the model of kebaya with sabrina neckline or make more variations as you like.
• If you have curvy or big figure, ask for more wires in the bustier. 4 wires is standard, 16 is the maximum. This functions to keep your torso in shape.
• For bustier, try it on by standing, squatting and sitting to make sure you will feel comfortable all the time on the D-day.

I love the details on my open-back and upper arm, how the pattern is flowing on my body ~ photo by my aunt ET

However, you still have to check on yourself for the best choice. Here are the great kebaya-makers (penjahit kebaya) I have visited during my sister's wedding preparation (the price list was from early 2015) and I highly recommend for you:

Anne Avantie
BUDGET: 
Rp 30.000.000 - Rp 100.000.000
ADDRESS:
Mal Kelapa Gading
Jl Raya Boulevard Gading Mal Kelapa Gading Bl C Lt 1/8-9
Kelapa Gading Barat, Kelapa Gading
Jakarta Utara 14240 DKI Jakarta
Roemah Pengantin by Anne Avantie
Grand Indonesia, West Mall UG Fl Unit 07
Jl. M.H. Thamrin No. 1
Jakarta, Indonesia 10310
Anne Avantie – Kantor Pusat
Komplek Tanah Mas
Jl Kalimas Brt Bl A-3/5 Kompl Tanah Mas
Panggung Lor, Semarang Utara
Semarang 50177 Jawa Tengah

Vera Kebaya (twitter, Instagram, Pinterest)
BUDGET: 
start from Rp 4.000.000,- for basic sequined kebaya (full payet)
Rp 15.000.000 - Rp 25.000.000 for bridal kebaya
ADDRESS:
Jl. Panglima Polim 5/62 Jakarta Selatan (by appointment only)
081318005733 (YANA) 
085780222250 (OKI)
verakebaya@me.com 

Joko Sutono (ex Biyan) 
BUDGET:
Rp 2.500.000 for short kebaya
start from Rp 10.000.000 for bridal kebaya
ADDRESS:
Glory Busana Prima
Jl. Haji Nawi Raya, belakang Masjid Nurul Huda No. 18, Jakarta Selatan
0816751057, 081219196461
Note for Joko Sutono:
The place might be hard to reach for it is located on small walking alley (only motorbike can get through--park your car in front or inside the mosque yard) behind a mosque but there is AC and a private consulting room that makes customers feel comfortable and carefully noted. Just beware if you want two-toned or more colors for kebaya. Make sure you know exactly what you want because playing with more than 1 color is tricky for the result may be tacky.)

Tina (ex Harry Darsono)
BUDGET:
start from Rp 250.000 for kebaya only, not sequined; 
start from Rp 1.000.000 for sequined kebaya
Rp 160.000-Rp 250.000 for bustier, depends on how many wires used
ADDRESS:Jl. Darul Ma'arif Gg. Langgar III, Fatmawati, Jakarta Selatan
085777051984
Note for Tina:
I fell in love with her works not just because of the cheap price but also by her passion on doing the "sexy" dress and kebaya--as she said. But she has only one small rental room on small walking alley (only motorbike can get through--park your car in front of the school yard) that it may be very hot inside during the fitting so make sure you don't have problem with heat. Tina's works are great and not many fittings to do until the kebaya is ready to wear, and fits perfectly for all of us who made our kebaya/dress with her. Her bustier is not as neat as what you can get at Pasar Mayestik. Minor imperfections, but it is in accordance to the cheap price. Not recommended for OCDs and perfectionist people.)

Bu Yati (ex Adjie Notonegoro)
BUDGET: 
start from Rp 750.000 for kebaya only, not sequined
start from Rp 2.500.000 for sequined kebaya (full payet)
Rp 400.000 for bustier
ADDRESS: 
Around Perumahan Pinang Griya Permai (I forgot the exact address)
Ciledug, Tangerang
081514527776
Note for Bu Yati:
The place is quite far from South Jakarta, but if you live around Tangerang or West Jakarta, this is a great option for making kebaya. She has her own house at the end of a road (you can park your car in front of her house) in a decent housing complex so it is quite comfortable to do the fitting. She has great taste and knows best trick on sewing the fitted kebaya (that I stole for my kebaya on the wrist-line the other dressmakers often miss out). The only reason I didn't sew my kebaya with her is because of the distance. I must say this one is highly recommended!

Bara (ex Ramli)
ADDRESS:
Jl. Tenggiri No.2 A, Kota Jakarta Timur
021-4721163, 021-47885198


For Rental Kebaya:

Rumah Kebaya (instagram)
ADDRESS:
Jl. Mampang Prapatan XV No.119, Jakarta Selatan 12790
0888.111.22.33, 08164803124, 081219138114

the outdoor

Last Sunday, I met Camui in Scandinavian Coffee Shop at Gading Serpong. She just got back from Medan and brought me crispy fried pork and I met her there for brunch at 10 in the morning (even that I just attended Kate's birthday party the night before that finished at 3 a.m.) But an invitation for some pork and coffee are always worth it, right?

the interior

our brunch

coffee!!

So we tried their café latte, green tea latte and banana nutella mille cake and agreed that it's all good (plus the great industrial interior design). Too bad they don't serve lunch (well it's a coffee shop, right) and we grew pretty hungry (and I needed more energy for I was lack of sleep) so we decided to go to Flavor Bliss and met Kate there.

buta signature curly ramen

We had ramen lunch at Ikkudo Ichi and had some catch ups. But it had been a very tiring week for all of us so we decided to separate and have our rest. Although it is such a great idea for having Sunday brunch with girl friend(s). So I might do it again soon!


Scandinavian Coffee Shop
Ruko Graha Boulevard D/15
Gading Serpong, Banten
+62 812-9117-9628
scandinavian.dept@hotmail.com

BFF!

As part of my urban backpacking week last week, I had a day spent with my elementary school friends. I borrowed my boyfriend's motorbike and rode all the way from Kemang to Fatmawati to Gandaria City. This was my first bike ride in Jakarta and it wasn't as scary as I thought it would be. I mean, riding bike in Bandung, Bali and Yogya is a great idea because of the laid back cities. But in the hectic metropolitan such as Jakarta? I had never dream of ever riding a bike there!

me, Sary, Meita, Maria and Monique

But sometimes situation will force you to do things you didn't wanna do and there will always be a first time for everything. Just like my first experiences hiring an Uber taxi and Go-Jek bike within the past month, riding bike on my own in Jakarta is another fun thing. It wasn't even that hard, to my surprise (I was imagining the big buses, giant trucks, endless current of other bikes and angry honking cars).

Sary performing on the stage

So I came to Gandaria City, parked the bike at the proper place (some malls in Jakarta don't have motorbike parking space), and met Sary (a friend I knew from Bali but lives in Palembang), and then joined Maria (my bff since elementary years) and her friend Monique. We had early dinner at La Hoya and had some catch ups and ice breaking.

at Thai Alley

We then moved to Toyota expo that was held on the atrium (which was the reason why Maria and Monique was there), and then met with Meita (another elementary schoolmate) and her husband, and finally, Alex. We had another meal at Thai Alley before going home. The small reunion was rather spontaneous but it succeeded gathering some of us, than the planned reunion that is harder to happen. But what was more interesting to me was to drive the bike on my own in Jakarta street. Oh, I am so proud of myself--LOL!

this is just a part of our big group

You must know that I've been busy that I hadn't post anything for almost a month now. Well there were new situations in my life with new friends, new boyfriend and new activities that I'm trying to adapt to. But Friday two weeks ago, on Sept 11, my sister and her husband called me at 3 p.m. and asked me to meet them ASAP at fX Sudirman for Bon Jovi Concert.

the situation while waiting for the show

So I hurried and took Go-Jek (which was my first time) and had to cut through such a desperate traffic jam all the way from Fatmawati. It was so frikkin' hot and tiring but finally I arrived at around 5 p.m. and met my sister and her big group (there were 18 of them). We then walked to the Gelora Bung Karno and picked the seats before it got too crowded. We got the seats at lower tribune area.

all smartphones were recording and lighting the audience' area

The performance was opened by Sam Tsui at 7 p.m. but I didn't enjoy it at all for the songs were completely unfamiliar and didn't relate to my ears at all. We had to wait for another 1 hour until Bon Jovi finally went on stage but it was very disappointing for me because their first four songs were all new and unfamiliar. I got bored and sleepy all over.

the whole group in three rows

But things went better once You Give Love A Bad Name (as I'd predicted to be their first song that night) was sang. For the next hour and a half, their old and new songs were sang in turn. I wouldn't say that I didn't enjoy the show at all because of course I did. Cross Road was the first cassette I ever bought when I was on 6th grade. But the show wasn't really that satisfying for me. Not as enjoyable as The Cranberries' I watched years ago at JRL.

our late dinner at Brewerkz: pork ribs, pork knuckle, sandwich, bacon wrap, and so on...

The performance ended at 10 p.m. and we had to once again walked by foot all the way from GBK to Senayan City for late dinner. We had all the pork menu at Brewerkz that night for 20 people of us and finished the feast at midnight. That night I didn't go back to BSD City but stayed in Jakarta for the next 6 nights instead. It was a fun urban backpacking like I used to do in 2001 staying over at my cousin's and friends' houses. Geez, how time flew and how things never changed (in this case, it's me who don't change)!

first Thirsty Thursday at Amei, Salsa Food City

I just realized I hadn't update my August activities. It was all started on first Thursday (Aug 6) when I went to Salsa Food City at Summarecon Mall Serpong to attend the so-called Thirsty Thursday (which I found from Couch Surfing), held by some 20-something expats who gather to drink beers and wanted to expand their friend circle. Some of the first few friends there were Lez (who made the event) and Kate--which became the two I was close the most.

archery at Senayan--my third time!

We hung out again the next Saturday for some Indian food, more beers and soju (Korean alcohol) at Karawaci, and did archery at Senayan on Sunday. After some late pizza lunch, Lez, Kate and I headed to Kemang to attend a pool party which I knew no one at, but quickly became friends with some of them and spent the rest of my August with one of the guys--whom I feel very dear to my heart now and fits me in a lot of ways. Well, who knows if he could be my soulmate?

some of my new friends at the pool party

I had never thought that the urge I felt to attend that random Thirsty Thursday event (which was so unlikely me) would brought me so many new friends and experiences. I even hang out at bars again (the last time I did was in Bandung in 2011) and hang out a lot at Kemang, my most favorite area in the whole Jakarta. But I guess you gotta trust your gut instinct, right? You'll never know the surprise inside your next chocolate will give!

the entrance to TACCE

I went to Bali yesterday, the first one-day trip I've ever did to the Island of the Gods. It was a business trip but me and my partners had a brief visit to this eco-friendly primary school at Jl. Ir. Sukarno, Banjar Pande, Pejeng, Gianyar area. The school name is TACCE (Tjok Agung Conservation and Cultural Education) Wood School Bali.

the goats

The school don't teach too many lessons. The curriculum is based on nature and human personality, so kids are taught to get connected and blending with mother earth. They plant, pet-farm and play. They develop great interaction skills between human, learn about cultures from around the world, create artworks, and just having fun, enjoying their early years as human. I guess this is the most important thing about being children.

playroom with bamboo curtain

As the kids will still get basic education about English grammar & vocabularies, Mathematics, Science, Geography and History, they are also taught spiritual teaching, yoga & meditation, physical education, theater arts, music, martial art, horse-back riding and have field trips. They have goats and rabbits as pets, organic vegetable gardens, and aquaponics plants in the green house. By this, they learn to take care of nature and be respective to other beings.

large yard just for the children playing!

The school carries the Neo-Humanism, an ecological, holistic, comprehensive philosophy. Drawing upon ancient teachings on the levels of consciousness, a neo-humanistic approach to education seeks to develop the more subtle capacities of the human mind. Neo-Humanism is the spirit of benevolence. To teach love one must embody it. To embody love one must see all as divine. To see all as divine one must practice methods of contemplation and inner reflection. Only then will one embody the true spirit of universal outlook in their thoughts and actions. (read more here)

aquaponic, the combination of fish and plant production using aquaculture and hydroponics systems

The school costs IDR 3,000,000.-/student/month and has 30 children going here from Monday to Friday now. The teachers are volunteers from many places around the world, as well as the multinational students. The kids are taught yoga as well, and this is really great for their self-control and as the base for their soul development. Perhaps if I had kids I'll send them here--and promote this idea to all of my friends. Too bad Jakarta (and other urban cities) don't have this kind of school. Anyone interested on building one, perhaps?

gardens and green house

TACCE Wood School Bali
Tjok Agung Conservation & Cultural Education
Jl. Raya Tampaksiring (Jl. Ir. Sukarno), Pejeng, Gianyar
+6282147949688
www.woodschoolbali.com

via lawpracticetoday

A friend posted this link of "11 Women On How They Knew They Didn't Want Kids" on her Facebook timeline (Huffpost). Surely I was tickled to click on the link and read the article. Overall, this article speaks up what I have in mind. Having this idea of being child-free since before my teenage years, I haven't really speak up about this but only to my closest circle.

Like those 11 interviewed women, I have more or less the same experience on the issue, being told that I'd change my mind eventually when I get older, that somehow a right man would change my perspective, etc. But no, it's not like that. For me, I've had this idea since my early school years, after all the doll-playing time were done.

I realized this even more in high school years with my first boyfriend, when I was daydreaming about what it would be like for me and him in the coming years, and I didn't see any kids there. I knew it wasn't how he wanted it. We got separated anyway, and so with other guys after him. I had never met a guy who would accept my condition not to have kids, that's why I had to prepare myself for not getting married--ever. This was the reason why I can bear being alone for so long, because children is my number one allergy in future planning (and most Indonesian men want kids).

Researches proved that 67% married couples experience a big drop in marital satisfaction after having children (Happify). And for my personal reason: I want to be with the guy who loves me just for me (now I'm being truly selfish) that he won't be using me as a 'machine' to deliver children only for their satisfaction, etc. It's not that I'm really that anti-kids, no. Children love me and I love them. I just don't want the kids to be mine or be responsible on their lives--too big a responsibility and too much a commitment for me, I guess.

"You'll make such a wonderful parent," my best old pal once said. I knew that, I always have. I know all the dos and don'ts when it comes to educate kids. I've helped taking care of my cousins who are 9-13 years younger than me so this isn't even to be questioned about. I don't need to prove anything about being a good parent or not. It's about not wanting one to be mine. It really is that simple. I simply don't want to have kids.

Trillions of people would question me, as their most happiness is having children or looking at babies. But this had never been my hobby, let alone a dream. I don't want to ever have to get pregnant and deliver a living being; I don't want to take care of and raise them; I don't want to be involved with any parenting thing--No. I don't want any of that. This seem really hard to be taken for most people, but I know this is what I always want.

One of my thousands of reasons is that I don't want to bring kids to this corrupted pathetic world. My other reason is that I prefer to take care of existed neglected children than to bear any more innocent soul into the world. In other words, I would rather to adopt kid(s) than to give birth to one if I'd ever change my mind. I thought this is much more a noble thing to do than to deliver them but not raising them right.

And if you have such a unique, one-of-a-kind, strange requirement of a future childless marriage life, you'll have a list of priorities for your spouse-to-be like I have. This one "silly" wish to be child-free seriously takes a great deal of effort for me on finding "the one", especially here in Indonesia. I've met a lot of great guys I'd have to leave just because of this, but this don't make me change my mind (of not having kids) at all.

I'd rather be with someone who shares the same value with me than to sacrifice my "freedom" just to keep the guy I love. Love, as we all know it, is just an illusion that our emotion creates to make us do silly things (but you know I'm such a lover tho). Love comes and goes, but life goes on. For me, a relationship must be based with love and at balance between emotion and logic.

I actually had never really believed that I would ever meet a guy who would meet this quality that would also match to my character and traits--it seemed too good to be true for me. But just as I was thinking about writing this, this guy appears in my life, as perfect as I wanted him to be--plus for not wanting kids as well. Children takes the most important place in any relationship/marriage, and a decision on not having any is just as important. I really am glad that I've found someone who shares the same vision with me although we had just met.. let's see how this one will turn out (;

hadn't played billiard since 2013 in Bali

I would rate my last July 2015 as my most active month ever. In just one month I could finish my writing for 2 request books, had a more intense muay thai practice at my complex's sport club, had 2x archery at Senayan, shooting at Blok M Plaza, billiard and karaoke at Q Billiard, and--for the first time since perhaps 2010--I had swimming in the 20x40m olympic size pool at Damai Indah Golf.

team archers from my elementary schoolmates

These kinds of physical activities aren't likely my style, but I was damn bored since my sister's wedding, having no feasible goal in the mean time. I have my projects deadline all July, but writing in my room was extremely boring especially when I had just recovered from 2-weeks of bed resting due to my cough & gastric illness. So I did some refreshing instead.

swimming pool at Damai Indah Golf & Country Club

Actually I'm liking my new activities. Who knew I could be good enough at archery and shooting? I got my bull's eye shot at my second practice with grade schoolmates last week (the friends I hadn't met for 17 years before and one of them I just met last week which made it 23 years of lost contact). And I just found my swimsuit back so I could say yes to swimming invitation now.

at muay thai practice

I don't know if I'll keep doing this for the rest of my life or if this is just temporary until I get my muse back and get on my track. But physical activities really help me getting my spirit and feel alive. I know I can't go back to my valley of sadness and should only go forward and reach higher. And meanwhile I'm trying to recollect myself back, from saying yes to all these new challenges I know that I can do all things in the world. Maybe so should you! (;

via pinimg

Today, for the first time since 2013, I met this old friend of mine at PIM. We got busy with our own problems and decided to meet up today and talked about many things. He is now married to a woman he used to tell me as his crush and we were really that caught up with our own worlds that I couldn't even attend his wedding. But what I love about true friends is that they remain friends with us no matter how long we don't meet or talk with each other.

So I met Alexis Pompink (an architect) and his wife Winny (an interior designer) today and chill at Starbucks Food Hall. Winny was doing her job at a table with her laptop while Pompink and I talked. We used to have this hours of talking and it was always the great, constructing, mindful talk as it was today. So we shared our lives for the past 1-2 years that we lost from each other.

To my surprise, Pompink told me he was kind of jealous at me. This is something new. I mean, look at him, already married at his own expense (which could be considered one of the indicators of being success here in Indonesia) and doing all his job under his own company's name, etc. While I am still single, still living at my Mom's house and do not have anything valuable whatsoever to be boasted about.

via pinimg

But Pompink gave me a whole new perspective in life. He doesn't measure success by wealth but by achievements. And this achievement doesn't always in form of award-winning or any performance. He sees my achievement from the book I wrote, from the adventure and experiences I had (since Bali, and so on) and from what I have done for my family (spending more time, taking care of each of them). He counts my closeness to my young cousins and what I had done for them (which can't be seen to others) as something precious.

I was touched. Seriously. This was one of the best things people ever said to me--to see the unseen kindness and listen the unspoken words. I had never seen my dedication to my family as something to be proud of, but my now-married friend just reminds me of how valuable the family bond is. He sees it as something instead of nothing.

I guess my perspective on life is changed once again. And I'm thankful for having such a great friend as Pompink. And tho we don't stay in touch constantly, I know he's one of the best friends I can always count on. I'm so happy for this revelation and for meeting Pompink and his wife today. Thank God!
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